Losing myself...

Frustration...

Agitation...

Fatigue...

Demoralisation...

All signs of being unappreciated? I'm left clueless...

My memory is really failing...side effect of not wanting to remember certain things?

Baby,keep me going...

Why the hell am I forcing myself to portray the image of a well-balanced person when I'm not? My life is in a mess sometimes i just wish to let it go...

Baby, keep me going...

Success....screw you for by the time...i'll most likely not have the life to enjoy what I've sown...

Baby, hold on to me...

Seriously, I've thought too much for others far too long and fuck it...live your life the way you want...be a crap ass...be a lazy bum...be a freeloader...be a disrespectful young punk...for all i care...fuck me for being stupid to try to influence you in your life...how dumb of me...you are you...and i am myself...

Baby, don't let me slip...

Perhaps...all my life i have not been setting a clear distinction between strangers,acquaintances,friends,good friends,best friends....worthy friends....perhaps its time to...how STUPID of me not to...be ruthless...be a bastard...

From today on...leave me alone as much as possible...allow me to fulfil what i initially set out to do...be a loner and concentrate on my own stuff...i've helped too much and poke my nose too much for my own well-being...i dont realli give a damn what you wanna think of me anymore...perhaps it did bother me at first but seriously...i dont owe anyone any explanation...just like you dont owe me any explanation for being late,for not submitting work,for not respecting the lecturers etc..it used to matter to me...not any more...

Lord, I'm losing myself as much as I'm losing my faith in You once again...Bring me back to you...but to follow your teachings would be for me to revert back to my old self...I'm lost...I really duno...I'm tired...Joyce would know...You would know...

Baby...stay with me till I fall asleep...thats when I find peace...